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✖ Monday, March 31, 2008.

what's more. dots ~
couldnt explain what feeling im having right now.
sometimes, i rather no one ever tell me.
pursuing ownself happiness should be in priority.
continuing it will receive happiness, i suppose.
9pm liao im stucked here lol.
it's time i should go and revise.. ;D

✖ Sunday, March 30, 2008.

just came back from kennychiang's bro chalet.
im dead beat. damn tired. gosh, im having insomia.
cant really slp last night, untill i really got nth to do.
ytd, overslept for flag day lol.
so wake up, called mrswong, but she didnt ans.
then nvm, forget it. call renyong ask them where they.
heard that they are going take cab to wildwild wet already,
i slack at home awhile more then take cab cause i actually intend to take train.
reached there, kwong say my face very pale, cause im sick ytd lol.
asked me not to play, how can i not play when i already reach here! lol.
had great fun, cant describe man lol.
haha, esp the ular lah, & the duno called what like pirate ship that kind lol.
bought the photos for ular lah de pics, bath & had dinner with the rest @ downtown foodcourt.
so i was going to kennychiang's bro chalet, walked with classmates to mrt, then took cab to the duno what changi sailing club, which is behind old changi hospital lol.
the changi hospital, damn eerie.
reached there, walk walk ard the beach with ww&cy before we could go in the chalet.
because his relatives alot lol.
so ard 2am+ we eat then go beach play fire sparkles and became emo, all four of us! kenny,ww,cy,me. all start emo hahaha.
know what we do? we light up those sparkles, then throw into the sea and made wishes.
1st throw, not a wish. say out in our life the girl which we loved most lol.
so 1,2,3 tgt shout and throw. cant actually listen clearly cause we had great coordination ;x
so made alot more wishes too, slacked there ard 1hr go back chalet eat again and bath lol. we bbq food, then feed the stray cats over there lol.
ard 4+ we see some ahbeng/ahlian going in the old changi hospital lol.
my god, when i looked into the sky above the hospital, it looked so eerie and they went in rofl. i was telling ww&kenny, if they go in by good means, nth will happen.
if they go in to disturb, they sure 'GG' lmao.
so after that we bathed.
then all play psp untill fall asleep.
next morning, which is today, cy first one wake up, 2nd me lol.
kenny and ww like dead pig lidat -.-
had ytd food heated, then had breakfast.
kenny&ww woke up at ard 12pm i suppose.
then slacked ard till 4+, kenny's father drove us home.
oh yah! i got my skin burned after having 'wild' under the sun rofl.
i can sense the 'pain' -.-
alright, end here.

✖ Friday, March 28, 2008.

im sick. fever, sore throat.
feel like slapping my fingers for typing the last sentence ytd lols.
didnt go to sch today.
went to see doc, and get myself a MC.
what a day for me, BORING.
supposely wanted to go sch, to have fun during band.
cause i miss my FLUTE! lmao.
what a great timing to get sick. -_-
tml going wildwildwet with classmates, i suppose im not gonna play.
gonna slp soon.
nights all!
SIAN SIAN SIAN ~

✖ Thursday, March 27, 2008.

wait wait wait! how long must i wait for my w960i
my parents are definitely dragging it.
they told to me wait, its been 2 weeks wtf.
i really hate my current phone.
1st of all, i dont have a memory crd,
2nd thing the buttons are too small i cant text properly.
3rd thing, I CANT DO A SINGLE SHYT WITH MY CURRENT PHONE.
god damn it, i didnt ask for alot.
its always either their too busy, or they just cant be bothered.
its always near midnight they would be at home, wtf is that.
sometimes, i forge my parents signature on consent forms.
alright, i not in the mood.
maybe because i hadnt sleep well in the past few days.
i hate my current school life seriously.
i dont have enough time to play, to sleep.
what i do was just spend more than 10hrs in school everyday.
reach home, im left with 3hrs to do whatever i want.
SIAN, i cant seem to control myself.
i didnt know theres so much difference, its obvious.
once before, the waves for you were strong.
right now, i sense its calming down.
my back is aching, dont know why.
i can sense my heaty throat.
"please god, i dont want to fall sick right now. mid-year exams is nearby"

✖ Tuesday, March 25, 2008.

shag shag shagggg !
nb, changed my skin cause my old one see also sian liao.
called my sis help me, but she copy everything then leave to me!
i think i spent 2hrs on making into this condition damn.
sch's boring&tiring. tho having fun.
went to play soccer at nel hse there de street soccer court ytd.
after playing, took 163 to tpy interchange with dom, kwong, andy, kow.
so we suddenly discussed until 4e4 chalet!
haha, im sure gonna organise 1 chalet on june holiday okay, with some help of others.
we need buns(girls)! many many! ;x
ppl from other class are definitely welcomed!
duh, i cant wait to having this chalet. must get gd results for mid year first ><
talked abt sat outing, prawning will be my first choice! its fun catching prawns ;D
not sure abt them, im okay with anything actually, i just dont want stay at home
took 31 with kwong, he's going to east coast.
when we board the bus, its raining cats and DOGS! lmao.
hmm, we tired, of cause both of us slept during the journey ;x
soo, reached home, watch tv, played dota, then slp le.
i guess i'll end here, sally chasing my work again.
tho my coursework everytime late hand in, my work are in TOP quality ;x
ohyah, ZHIHAO! ITS FUCKING SMELLY ROFLMAO.

✖ Monday, March 24, 2008.

just cant slp, i cant barely close my eyes.
woke up at 11am today, daydream at home while thinking of doing hw.
but didnt do also lmao.
at msn, asked baldric for dota. then he told me they going out for dota.
so was meeting dom, mengkit & baldric @ azure.
called ww, zhihao for inhse lan too. just nice cy,kenny&ww at united.
when i reached there at bout 6pm, heard dom they all left -.-
so nvm, didnt play. had dinner with zhihao&shaun.
after dinner, sit down at bus wait for their bus chat&gossip awhile lol.
so after their bus came, i ownself go novena take 21 home.
i didnt know, its so difficult.
we care for ea other, dont we?
we observe everything single thing ea other did, didnt we?
its not i want to know, but its all everything i could know.
i wished i could be kept in the dark, but suddenly, everything just pop out.

✖ Sunday, March 23, 2008.

just reached home not long.
took NR7 again, rather than taking the cab lol.
went to easter day celebration in a church at jurong o.o
what a brainwashing ceremony lmao.
sang songs, said prayers & a drama that shows how jesus scarifices for human being.
aiyah, didnt know christians get so influenced with all this lol.
anyway, i believed one thing what they say.
they said god forgive us, & its time we should start to forgive ppl.
god gave us 2 hands, one for receiving & one for giving out.
okay, stop that lmao.
after that gathering, met some new friends ;D
wanted to go play pool with them, but somehow im sick of pool -.-
so went movie with max&ww, cy go find jinqiang for christina bday.
watched semi-pro, quite nice. but tmd max slp during the last part, lols.
what fascinate me wasnt their comedy, was their striving for aims.
believe in what you wanna do, and strive for it.
today saw quite a number of ppl.
saw dar,ivan,eric,jovint at parklane.
saw timothy on the way to cathay.
alright, end here.

✖ Saturday, March 22, 2008.

just back home! damn tired -.-
my eyes' veins were all sooo red.
went out just now for swimming, gym training.
wanted to watch movie at first, but cy no money lol.
so we went to do something fun and wont use money ;x
4+ called dom said im not going, then 6pm go lavender meet ww, jq(both), cy, kennychiang.
that place was actually jinqiang father's friend de condo.
had some fun over there o.o (waterhorse! ;x)
tmd only i in proper attire, others all wear slippers.
so we got chased out of the gym room -.-
had 10mins suana over there too.
settled our dinner @ macs after that, kenny&jianqiang went home.
played 1 match lan after eating.
me ww,cy,qiang so decided to watch movie !
bus-ed to cathay meet qinggui and chung gam.
watched the duno what empress de, quite nice o.o
after that show, walked to bugis took NR7 home.
guess what? i missed my stop lmao.
i didnt know what im doing, either im just too tired or im too focused thinking of sth lol.
the next stop was so damn far away can zzz. PLS DONT LAUGH AFTER READING OKAY!
walked 10mins to reach home, kan tired! gonna slp after i bathe.
tml going to ww's friend de musical play.
okay, end here.

✖ Friday, March 21, 2008.

hello everybody!
woke up at 10.30am, got some fucker scammer called me.
told me about i won a lucky draw need take ic go down orchard.
i knew it was scam haha.
i let him say alot alot of things then i say ' i dont think i need it thankyou!, KUP' rofl ;x
hmm, nth much bout today, had sports meet ytd.
was actually meeting kwong the same bus,
but he told me he missed the bus so he was taking cab.
so i also took cab to tpy meet classmates :/
tmd, my sis nvr pay. make me going pok liao.
the whole sports meet was so boring to me -.-
saw some horrible scenes lmao.
went out with classmates after that.
went to play pool.
tmd meet 2.30 only wallace and mengkit came on time.
others all late at least 70mins! -_-
so we played first luh.
aiks, pool play long also sian. im already getting sick on pool -.-
went to lan after that, went home after lan.
gosh, in order to end, i chose to scarifice.
this is what heaven chose, this is what heaven wanted to test me.
im really, really getting .. i duno what to say, what to do.
i sense sth, heaven is getting so unfair.
whereby ppl often get things well, but i always get misunderstood.
or maybe, its all cause of me, myself,
taking up all these challenges that leads me to a wrong path.
dont mention it, thats what i always say to my best friends,
which all those unhappiness, used to have in the past.
&i knew, no more shortcuts for me. i gotta go for a straight route.
i've tried ways indirectly, i've tried to make it special.
by all means, the outcomes were just unpleasant.
im always getting some influence from some friends.
maybe .. they dont suit me.
differences? i dont know, im always so blur.
if this makes you feel better, i would rather it stay on this way.
the way you treat me, the way i receive, they aint same.
im sry for my attidude, my temper.
jinqiang, wenwei, chingyung, ivan, darry, jovint, ian, bryan, zhiwen, andrew
&many more, brothers all the way.

✖ Tuesday, March 18, 2008.

i really want know to, was it a test? was it delibrate?
&im still confused today. some parts were revealed.
hmmmms,
went to sch like dead ytd.
panda eyes were so obvious lmao.
tried to make myself awake but still fell asleep in the last few periods -.-
so, had my nap during assembly ;x
during band, was slacking like hell lols.
bully marcus, disiao trumpet section ;x
tmd, our performance on sat was cancelled cause of that damn principal.
she said she want our band to play with gd schs like RI, wtf ?
had to tell my friends no need pay for tickets liao lol.
straight away sleep after reach home.
went to sch late today, 9am.
though i looked 'can't be bothered' & i doesnt want to be bothered,
it'll always flash through my mind. SIAN ~.~
GOD DAMN IT, WTF AM I DOING! I REALLY DUNO. FUCK IT.
nth much, had a stamina test during pe.
im weak luh, lmao.
after sch, maths erp, played basketball.
damn tired, guess im gonna slp now.
once you miss it, you missed it, so forget it.
just like what i told him, what can we do?
let it be right!? haha, yes i can do it!

✖ Sunday, March 16, 2008.

hmm, this few days was just playing&playing ;x
but wasnt quite in the mood tho.
stress-ed bout this&that again.
im trying to make myself play to the max before sch reopens.
argh, sian. i got nth to blog about.
sometimes i think, when it comes to understanding of me,
nobody had ever done that.
not even my parents, they duno what im thinking.
none! not even my best friends.
see me moody, will just ask what happen&blah.
talked about what to do.
that wasnt my aim at times, i had them talking&talking.
theres many things which i know how to do.
but theres sth that alot dont know bout me.
i just couldnt let it out, who truly understand me will know.
i tried not to bother about it, i tried my very best.
but.. in the end it will always make me headache bout it..
that little thing that made me think so much.
that little history that made me feel so desperate.
that little promise that made me so deceived.
i hope theres somebody.
i hope theres somebody who can stop me from paranoiding.
i hope that somebody will always be by my side when i need them.
i hope that somebody will always be by my side when i need someone to talk to.
i hope that somebody will always be there to share my mixed feelings.
i hope&i hope..
apparrently, there isnt.
&right now, i feel like strangling someone.
alright, today shall be the date of 'letting go emotions' maybe i should name today as emotional day haha =p
tml will be fine for me!
tml&tml will be better for me!
tml&tml&tml will be wonderland! ;x

✖ Wednesday, March 12, 2008.

tues!
holidays are moving fast.
had my chinese mock test today,
late for 30mins lmao.
so just finished paper1 on time.
paper2 halfway fell asleep also just nice on the dot finish lols.
after chinese, walked down sch with qiang,cy,ww. whole shirt wet lols.
lucky got wear extra shirt.
took bus to novena, find ry they all to have lunch.
but i reach foodcourt only see nel,dom,ck&kenny -.-
ry they all at bk.
after ry finish, he came to find me.
went home tgt.
reached home, played my cabal! lv15 liao. ;x
im trying to get used to the buttons, very hard to travel ard the map -.-
played till 6pm, went down to cathay watch 10k BC.
i thought only qiang,ww&cy.
tmd reach there, got 12 lols.
ian,bryan,zw,sean,andrew so on ~ was there too.
bought the 9.50pm tic.
went to parklane eat&play pool.
the show was average to me when everyone say its nice -.-
after the show, all took last bus home :/
wanted to play lan actually, i lazy walk to bugis take bus then took cab lmao.
reached home, played dota with ivan&datou(leonard) ;x


i kept telling myself,
i aint loving you no more.

✖ Sunday, March 9, 2008.

just woke up o.o
ytd went again to quite late again.
reach home in the morning 6am rofl.
basically, bought clothes, slack, watch movie.
at first they said was watching movie,
then ltr say go wy hse slack lols.
so i went to bugis to meet ww&cy and buy my perfume and clothes first.
i dont like those cheapo ones, so i walk like 2 round before i buy.
bought a jeans @$53 ;x
button up short sleeve @$35
perfume @$54 (price after 40% discount ;x)
know why i suddenly so rich,
cause some bastard return me money! ;x
hahs, so after that went to wy hse slack.
played blackjack.
i was just sponsoring money den i sit at sofa watch scenery LOL.
ard 5+ went to parklane play pool again.
was pretty boring, i felt so tired.
ard 9pm i guess, they went to eat.
then come back play pool again -.-
they left at 10+
so after that we went to cathay buy movie tickets.
nb so many show full liao -.-
no choice watch water horse.
pay $10 watch how to water horse swim LOL.
aiyah sian, actually wanna go for another show cause qg&cg coming.
but then, when they reached, step up 2 de tickets sold out liao lols.
the last show de ticket -.-
so nvm, we walked to jalan besar there play lan.
then after that, cy&ww go first.
me jq,cg,qg went to macs for breakfast.
soooo, we slacked there for ard 1hrs.
ask me take first bus, i also damn tired liao.
nvm lor, almost fell asleep in macs lol.
so after that jq&qg walked home.
i pei cg walk to lavender then take first bus.
tiring&boring sat though ! lmao.
sunday.
as usuals, plain sunday.
woke up at ard 3pm.
i gotta say that liufang is a damn cheerful girl lmao.
shes funny, she make ppl laugh blah ~
thanks liufang for chatting with me on msn&cheered me up.
yes gotta be calm. ;D
going for a drink ltr! ard 8pm.
tml got chinese erp&band siannnnnnnnnnn.
8.30am to sch till 4.30pm -.-
nth much, end here.


its a simple job,
but it took me so long.

✖ Thursday, March 6, 2008.

thurs !
hello everybody ;x
woke up at 6.20am today.
was nearly late for sch ;x
went to sch with the heck care mood,
cause ! its gonna holidays.
yip say what my shirt and pants 50 50 lmao.
just because my pants were too low! -.-
blah, raj talked to me in the morning.
want me to write essays after march holidays. damn it -.-
after sch, slacked awhile in sch.
then went to ljs find ry go home tgt.
but we decided to jalan jalan ;x
had some fun in novena,
kenny tried the boxing bag.
kwong act like 'L' rofl.
played table soccer.
i squeeze that paper ball inside the table soccer ;x
walked back to sch to take bus home.
but suddenly, my bro called
said that he was near the sch.
shunbian meet parents. i got pretty good comments from yip and wong! wahahah;x
but bro kept criticising my results just because my sis got 3 A1s :/
after bro drive out of sch, he&his friend straight say, wah buay lun liao. they wanna smoke -.-
so they open the windows and smoke lmao.
so bro fetch me home and had his own activities with his friends.
reached home, played dota then change and went to sch for briefing talk.
nb the idiot raj talk for so fucking long !
waste my time listen to those craps.
went to class cause ww wanna charge his psp lols.
after that, me ww, cy, qiang went to novena's kfc to have our dinner.
bus-ed home after that.
not sure whether tml will mia sch anot ;x
last day liao, sian daooooooooooo. SPORTS HEAT&BAND -.-
alright end here.

✖ Wednesday, March 5, 2008.

sup all !
i really didnt went to sch today ;x
causeeeeeeeeee, i really didnt have the mood.
i kept think of all sorts of things, i've great imagination rofl.
so slping was the best thing for me ;x
i slpt for like 15hrs ? ;x woke up at 4.30pm
had some weird dreams, & ppl said that dreams are often opposite.
seasons are changing, waves are crushing.
i woke up, heard the song the song Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus.
i'll be alright after i leave BHSS i guess ;x
thats the only way i thought of hahas.
nth happened actually, just that im disappointed with myself.
i felt im not a good friend, not a good person.
im sorta..
end here.


i shouted to the seas, but you'll nvr hear.
i had so much things in my mind, but i just couldnt let them out.

✖ Tuesday, March 4, 2008.

past few days, i had been going sch with some great mood
but went home with unpleasant feelings.
cause, stress from sch work and everything in sch.
its gonna be parents' meeting on thurs.
failed 2 subjects lols.
not sure im still getting my w960i anot, parents were like so moody nowadays.
i guess im gonna get my tongue piercing somewhere during march holidays ! ;D
&alright this post gonna be short, cause im going out for lan ;x
toodles !

11.40pm.back from lan.
i felt tired. i felt frustrated. i felt naive.
i felt so many unpleasant things !
dont feel like going for sch tml.
well pity you, my friend.
i know you hadn't got the determination to let go.
those words from you were just external.
internally, its suffering, am i right ;x
&.. so do i.
all good things often comes to an end.
just let nature decides&hope we're all happy (x


im too vulnerable to setbacks,
i may fall, but might not be able to stand up.
maybe, its not my best.
but always, im trying.

✖ Sunday, March 2, 2008.

went out with classmates to celebrate nel bday ytd.
met them at cine, went to e2max room slack till 6.
after that went to parklane play pool.
the pool table there sucks. lol
after that one by one go, then waited for qiang to come down.
sitting at mac there, suddenly saw mrleng.
so i said hello, he was playing cs with his students lols.
after qiang reach, went to cathay.
watch sky of love ! damn nice la.
seriously, i recommend all go watch. though its 2hr show,
its damn touching, sure cry de ;x
sacrifices made by both parties.
esp with the theme song, heavenly days&last song.
alright i gonna do my f&n liao, by tml must hand in.
end here !

✖ Saturday, March 1, 2008.

im getting impulsive these few days.
just had a big quarrel with parents.
i know im wrong, shouldnt raise my voice on them.
im truly sry.
well, i cried.
im still gonna for my nel&qiang bday celebration.